Jehosaphat Blow: as unlike Coldplay as possible

Jehosaphat Blow (Donkeysack Records) is...Oh, who am I kidding? Like I could possibly do a better job describing this musical genius than he has of describing himself.

Complete the sentence. Jehosaphat Blow is...

abusing himself as you read this, (Thanks Fox Tracks models!) and the coolest garagey-punkish rocker in China at the moment. But, you know, that's like saying I'm the __________ (adjective) __________ (noun) in ____________ (famous place or sanitation equipment). Insert your own ad-lib interview joke there.

What is essential to every Jehosaphat Blow song?

I usually mention shaking something, i.e., hips, bacon etc., getting drunk, some euphemism for fucking, but I'd say what is really essential is being as unlike Coldplay as is humanly possible. Which isn't hard if you are human.

Why should I have your music in my collection?

Multiple choice:
a) It smells nice.
b) You have no bands starting with J on your i-pod. (Jethro Tull doesn't count. They are Muppets.)
c) You never want to have sex with a person ever again.
d) I am the coolest garage-punk-like rocker in China.

If there is such a thing as an afterlife and you get to be in the house band, who do you recruit to fill out the band?

Animal from the Muppets on drums. Is Meat Loaf dead yet? He could be the drums. How about Chico Marx on piano? And bass, either Charles Mingus or the bass player for Kajagoogoo.

If you could write and perform a song with one artist, who would you choose? Why?

I think Prince would be a good choice because he seems very obsessive-compulsive. He would do everything. You know, composed, produced, performed and arranged by Prince and all that jerking off of the ego thing. So, I could just sit there and drink beer while he masturbated musically all over the place and got everything perfect while wearing Cuban heels and ruffles. Then, you know, I stand up, strum a chord, and fart. He turns it into a funk opera.
Also, I could wear all purple for once and no one would laugh at me, and since he is kind of a wee lad (that's short in Irish) he would make my music seem taller.

What would you be doing if you weren't making music?

I'd probably cure cancer or be in porn. It's a toss-up.


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